Random Exercise 190601

Tone: If I’m loving, then it is reflected in the tone. Although we’re taught not to overly use adjectives in poetry, it can’t be helped. Not every one will understand subtle reference (as shown in the first line below of the Traditional tone example). Using “softly” next to “skin” makes it easy to associate the two and imagine someone with soft skin. With “heart” right there on the same line, the imagery is strengthened further. Right selection of words continue this theme of something “tender” in the scene being painted.

Traditional:
Softly skin my heart,
darling. Let me soothe
your night away now
by your tender side

Modern:
Dawn’s speckled opening light;
day had broken fast,
night had retreated thus.
This silent parting gift.

Character: A common convention is that strong speak strong; weak speak weak. These are the two most basic types, but there are others.

Strong:
You dare speak with
civility when all I
desire is truth? Speak!

Weak:
Were it certain that
there was something, would
it be worth taking.
Or more properly, surrendered?

This, of course, can be inverted so that what appears strong can actually represent a weakness. As is well-known, a person’s strength is also their weakness just as someone’s weakness often engenders strength. This inversion can be seen if you re-read both example pieces with the understanding that on the surface, WYSIWYG; but if you scratch below, you see the opposite, i.e, the latter might also show a person who is more thoughtful and not spontaneous while the former example reveals a frustration expressed that probably reveals a character who is impatient and unable to clearly communicate the original intent. It can go many ways depending on how many layers you scratch.

Vocabulary: Language conveys something about the character. The type, or kind, of language, especially, gives both a simple and most direct view of character.

Everyday:
Aw heck, what crap
is this? Didn’t I
just say ten minutes
ago that we need
to hit them good
and hard? Didn’t I?

Slightly Formal:
Learned friends, esteemed
fellows. Whom shall be
elevated from among us
today. Dustin? Or Hoffman?

Moronic:
Livid lives live in
Desperate times seeking comfort
From sublime lemons, the
Tart and pert kind.

The moronic is just an identifier to show the different types of language that can be used in various ways. It may not be a good example other than to show the slightly formal language being used in a deliberate manner that may seem pretentious these days.

© 2017 L. Tafa

 

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Author: b20f08

I enjoy solo wargaming and writing. The first caters to the boy that never grew up; the latter satisfies a deep desire to communicate. Cheers.

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