Exercise 060801

It’s hard to say

what will surface the

day when you depart

for good. A part

of me will feel

relief that you no

longer will suffer, and

that you will be

with your parents and

grandfather too. And I

almost forgot my brother.

I know Dad would be

most heartbroken of all;

you’ve always been the

anchor for us all,

but most of all

for him. Through both

lean and full times.

I would like to

believe I am making

my peace with you.

I don’t even know

if it’s apt; it

may seem callous and

cold and contrived. But

if it’s not aired,

then it will survive

to loiter in the

shadows of my mind.

And pop out at

the most worst of

times; among distraught family,

that’s just not something

you would approve of

anyway. Decorum mattered a

lot to you. So,

I guess I am

complying with some imagined

wish that you might

have conveyed to me

had we learned to

communicate like most people

do in daily life.

But I guess I

am counting more on

the fact that we

understand each other as

only a mother and

son would, like we

did when much younger.

So, if it’s time,

it’s time; I will

miss like the many

times I have silently

cried alone at that

future dread. Like now.

 

© 2017 L. Tafa

 

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Author: b20f08

I enjoy solo wargaming and writing. The first caters to the boy that never grew up; the latter satisfies a deep desire to communicate. Cheers.

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